Pirates go to camp
by PalindromeofUnknownFruit
Summary: Your favorite pirates go to camp to work as consolers. What will happen?
1. Consolers?

"'Allo, Sparrow."

Jack Sparrow, a bit confused, turned to see the voice addressing him.

"Ello Hector. Where are we again?"

"That's a question I'd like answered." said Elizabeth Swann, who stepped out behind Jack.

"Is this a curse or somethin'?" Pintel spoke up.

"Eee! Eee!!" screamed Jack the Monkey.

"Pipe down all of you!" Barbossa yelled. He looked around at the surroundings and turned back to the people before him.

"It seems that we've been put under a curse of some sort."

"No duh."

"WHO SAID THAT?"

"It was me, Hector." Said a woman dressed in a black suit. His eyes widened and he took a step down and ran over to the group.

"Who's that?"

"Ellie Marks. She's a powerful sorceress."

"What's she want to do to us?"

"Let's cut to the chase?" she walked over to them. "After much research, I've decided a reasonable punishment for leaving me all those years ago."

"There was a reason for that," Babrossa said.

"I don't care if you had to save the world. You don't leave a note after your marriage night telling your wife you're leaving her."

"IT WAS A NICE NOTE!"

"I DON'T CARE! DO YOU KNOW WHAT MY MOTHER SAID?"

"SHE'S A BAT!"

"EXCUSE ME?"

"Hey! HEY! What's that got to do with us?" Elizabeth piped up.

"SHUT UP!"

She quieted down.

"You all are in the year 2007. This summer you're going to be consolers at this summer camp for the whole summer."

"How long is that?" Ragetti asked.

She rolled her eyes.

"Figure it out." She walked over to the podium that she had summoned.

"These are the cabins you're assigned, two consolers each cabin. Girls camp to the left, boys to the right. The schedules for the activities will be given tomorrow."

There was a crunching sound from behind and Ellie turned around.

"Mr. Turner, nice to see you."

Elizabeth looked up. It had only been three months since she last saw him. But there he was. She ran over and jumped into his arms.

"How are you here? You should be- you- "

"I was let go when she called me here."

"You're no longer the captain?"

"Or immortal."

She hugged him tighter and Will hugged her back. There was a cough from the group and Ellie sneered.

"You'll be seeing a lot of him before you all leave. Boy and girls have activities together."

She passed out the clipboards and they each read the assigned cabins and rooms quietly. They each looked sick, mad, and happy.

Will was the one who was mad.

"I'm paired in the same cabin with Jack?" he said.

"ahh, Turner. Don't be so mad."

"I'm having mixed feeling. They include sickness and anger."

"I'm paired with…Mary Jane?" Elizabeth read.

"She won't be here for some time." Said Ellie.

"I have to manage a whole cabin of thirteen year old girls by myself for some time?"

Ellie stood the podium.

"I'll read out the pairings." She said. "Elizabeth and Mary Jane, The Siren cabin, Jack and Will, the Jolly Roger cabin, Barbossa and Gibbs, the Captain cabin, Pinter and Ragetti, the Hoagie cabin, Jack the Monkey and Marty, the Argh cabin."

"How come we have the 'Hoagie' cabin? All the others have similar themes." Pinetl asked.

"What's a 'hoagie'?"

"Figure it out."

"I'm tired of figuring things out!"

"Meet at the dining hall tomorrow. We're meeting the campers."

!#$&())(&$!#$&())(&$#!#$&()(&$#!#$&()(&$$&()

I hope you guys liked it.


	2. Attack of the Honey Bears and Activity 1

The bell soon rang for activity two, and Jack, who had just had a gallon of lake water in his lungs, had his next activity with the Turners.

"What's next? Flaming archery?" he looked at the list. It read 'sailing'.

His face lit up, and he ran over to Will and Elizabeth, who had forgotten that this was camp, and where kissing in the corner.

"Bloody heck, you all are some cute it's disgusting. Look what we have next," he threw down the slip.

"Sailing!" he laughed.

Elizabeth and Will smiled. But there was a problem.

"Who's captain?" Elizabeth asked.

Jack looked at the others.

"Captain Sparrow sounds better than Captain Turner."

"Let Jack be captain, as long as he doesn't yell to much we'll be fine."

!#$&()(&$#!

"That's the boat we're sailing on?" Jack asked. Will and Elizabeth looked down at the ten foot long Sunfish.

"That can't be right. What about the deck moppers? Where's the wheel? The sails? WHERE DO THEY KEEP THE RUM?"

"We don't have rum," said a camper. "But we have bug juice."

"I don't want to eat the juice of bugs. And they say I'm not appropriate. They've got campers squishing the juices out of bugs."

"It's good sir. It's fruit punch."

"I don't want to punch fruit."

Will and Elizabeth climbed on board. Jack sat up by the sail. But there was another problem. Barbossa got on the 'ship' with them.

"I'm being the captain," he said.

"I'm the captain."

"I'M THE CAPTAIN!"

"IT'S ME!"

"ME!"

"SHUT UP WE'RE GOING TO CAPSIZE AND WE'RE NOT EVEN TEN FEET AWAY FROM SHORE!!!"

"SHUT UP AND MAN THE SAILS!"

"IT'S A TEN FOOT LONG BOAT! ARE YOU ALL REALLY HAVING THIS CONVERSATION?" Screamed the girl who was picking at her toews

"Who are you anyway?"

"My name's Delilah."

"Then how about you get on and mop the deck!?" threatened Jack.

"Are you serious? Have you been hit in the head a lot? There's no room."

"I SAID GET ON TOE PERSON!!!"

Delilah got on and took a rag that was in the bucket. Avoiding the feet she scrubbed off the alge. The boat set off into the lake as the campers watched from shore.

"Turn right!!! TURN RIGHT!!!" Jack screamed. Will turned right.

"THAT'S LEFT!! I MEANT MY RIGHT!" he took the rag and hit Will with it. Will hit him back, and Jack pulled out his sword. Delilah's eyes widened and Elizabeth rolled her eyes.

Will stood up like Jack and they started to fight.

"What are they doing?" asked one camper from shore.

"I don't know. Are they sword fighting?"

"THIS IS COMPLETELY INSANE!! CAMPERS ARE WATCHING!!!" screamed Elizabeth.

Delilah had had enough. She ducked and reached for the tiller and turned right. The boom came and knocked Jack and Will into the water.

"NOT AGAIN!!! IS CALYPSO JUST OUT TO GET ME?" Jack screamed after spitting out lake water.

"Calypso is the goddess of the sea!" Will said.

"SHUT UP!"

"They're going to drown if they don't stop trying to fight in the water." Elizabeth said.

"Downside?" Barbossa asked.

Ellie had seen this from her office. She grabbed the mega phone and ran out to the dock.

"JACK AND WILL! IN MY OFFICE!!!!"

I HOPE YOU LIKED IT! I UPDATED QUICKER!!!!


	3. Sailing and Swordfighting

The bell soon rang for activity two, and Jack, who had just had a gallon of lake water in his lungs, had his next activity with the Turners.

"What's next? Flaming archery?" he looked at the list. It read 'sailing'.

His face lit up, and he ran over to Will and Elizabeth, who had forgotten that this was camp, and where kissing in the corner.

"Bloody heck, you all are some cute it's disgusting. Look what we have next," he threw down the slip.

"Sailing!" he laughed.

Elizabeth and Will smiled. But there was a problem.

"Who's captain?" Elizabeth asked.

Jack looked at the others.

"Captain Sparrow sounds better than Captain Turner."

"Let Jack be captain, as long as he doesn't yell to much we'll be fine."

!#$&()(&$#!

"That's the boat we're sailing on?" Jack asked. Will and Elizabeth looked down at the ten foot long Sunfish.

"That can't be right. What about the deck moppers? Where's the wheel? The sails? WHERE DO THEY KEEP THE RUM?"

"We don't have rum," said a camper. "But we have bug juice."

"I don't want to eat the juice of bugs. And they say I'm not appropriate. They've got campers squishing the juices out of bugs."

"It's good sir. It's fruit punch."

"I don't want to punch fruit."

Will and Elizabeth climbed on board. Jack sat up by the sail. But there was another problem. Barbossa got on the 'ship' with them.

"I'm being the captain," he said.

"I'm the captain."

"I'M THE CAPTAIN!"

"IT'S ME!"

"ME!"

"SHUT UP WE'RE GOING TO CAPSIZE AND WE'RE NOT EVEN TEN FEET AWAY FROM SHORE!!!"

"SHUT UP AND MAN THE SAILS!"

"IT'S A TEN FOOT LONG BOAT! ARE YOU ALL REALLY HAVING THIS CONVERSATION?" Screamed the girl who was reading at breakfast.

"Who are you anyway? And what are you reading?"

"My name's Delilah. I'm reading the 12th night."

"Then how about you get on and mop the deck!?" threatened Jack.

"Are you serious? Have you been hit in the head a lot? There's no room."

"I SAID GET ON 12th!!!"

Delilah got on and took a rag that was in the bucket. Avoiding the feet she scrubbed off the alge. The boat set off into the lake as the campers watched from shore.

"Turn right!!! TURN RIGHT!!!" Jack screamed. Will turned right.

"THAT'S LEFT!! I MEANT MY RIGHT!" he took the rag and hit Will with it. Will hit him back, and Jack pulled out his sword. Delilah's eyes widened and Elizabeth rolled her eyes.

Will stood up like Jack and they started to fight.

"What are they doing?" asked one camper from shore.

"I don't know. Are they sword fighting?"

"THIS IS COMPLETELY INSANE!! CAMPERS ARE WATCHING!!!" screamed Elizabeth.

Delilah had had enough. She ducked and reached for the tiller and turned right. The boom came and knocked Jack and Will into the water.

"NOT AGAIN!!! IS CALYPSO JUST OUT TO GET ME?" Jack screamed after spitting out lake water.

"Calypso is the goddess of the sea!" Will said.

"SHUT UP!"

"They're going to drown if they don't stop trying to fight in the water." Elizabeth said.

"Downside?" Barbossa asked.

Ellie had seen this from her office. She grabbed the mega phone and ran out to the dock.

"JACK AND WILL! IN MY OFFICE!!!!"

I HOPE YOU LIKED IT! I UPDATED QUICKER!!!!


	4. Jump Rope Attacks and The Meeting

"I'm am appalled. Sword fighting. On a boat. IN FRONT OF CAMPERS. Have you two lost your bloody minds? I'll have to check through their mail for two weeks before I can trust you both again so they can forget this. Do you know what damage you could have costs to the boat and yourselves? NOT TO MENTION THE OTHERS ON BOARD. You two are terrible role models. In fa- ARE YOU LISTENING?"

No, they weren't actually. Will was looking through an art book and Jack was playing with an interesting piece of lint he had found of his Camp Pirate shirt.

"Do you think the laundry pays attention to these things? There lint on everything. Even the bloody laundry bags. We don't even wash those. Are you sure that Myra or whatever that woman's name is isn't sneaking off to go play the slots?"

Ellie's finger shot out sparks Jack's lint flew out of his hands.

"Hey! You took away Juan!"

"ENOUGH!" she crushed the lint in her fist.

"Eek!" Jack squeeked. "he had kids somewhere, I bet. You just killed they're father."

"Lint doesn't have families it would- IT'S A BLOODY BALL OF LINT!!!!" she threw a piece of paper at Jack.

"What's this?"

"It's your hours for kitchen duty. Both of you. You'll be working lunch and dinner with One Eyed Joe. Also, my brother Carl will be moving into your cabin to make sure you don't pull anymore stunts like that."

Will looked at the paper for kitchen duty, still not paying attention.

"You're excused."

!#$&((&!#$&(&$#!!#$&(&$#!#$&

"What was that about?" Elizabeth asked Will as he walked out of the office. Elizabeth had slipped out of crafts, letting the other counsoler take control. Elizabeth didn't know there was more kids than the ones that were in her cabin, but the camp had kids running from 7-17. She had spent most of the afternoon exploring and found more cabins by the lake.

"We're on kitchen duty," Will said. Elizabeth frowned. She had snuck out to McDonalds and stole a quilt from a girl in the Mermaid cabin. She was going to plan a picnic, but she guessed she had to return the quilt to the poor little girl and feed the food to some hungry seventeen year olds who hated camp food.

"What's that welt on your leg?" he asked looking down at her legs. Elizabeth had a huge, pulsing welt on her shin.

"I was looking around the camp and some kids where playing jump rope. They let go and it hit me really hard. But they say it's not infected."

Bushes rustled by them. Someone mumbled "Damn."

They didn't pay it any attention. Will stopped and found a ring on the street. He caught up with Elizabeth.

"Hey, look." He slipped it onto her finger. "I just relized I haven't given you one."

"Thanks." She took his neck and pulled his face down to hers.

Gibbs whistled as he walked by. They blushed and hurried onto their next activity.

MEANWHILE

The alliance of Will Lovers was meeting in a spot they had found. It was a small creek and the twenty four girls sat around. All except one, who still sat with her feet in the water reading her book.

"Our attempts where futile." Said Angie, an officer with her three friends behind her. "The leg's not infected."  
"WHAT GOOD ARE YOU?" screamed the leader. "We must elinate her at all costs."

"You're actually starting to sound kind of scary," the girl reading the book. "By the way, where's the gummies? You said you'd have them."

"We only told you that because that's the only way you'd join."

"I didn't want to join. You dragged me here."

"Whatever. How about you get out of that book, Elizabeth Bennet and listen to us?"

Elizabeth B. frowned. She had always been made fun of for her name. Maybe Pride and prejudice was her favorite book and her mother's as well? So what? She had the main characters name. Big deal.

"I don't want to. This is just stupid. They're happy. They're in love. Can't you just leave them alone?"

"NEVER." The leader barked. "The camping trip is coming up, that'll be our chance. OFFICER BLAKELY. Your ideas?"

Blake cleared her throat and set up charts against the rock. "We'll need a behive," she said pointing with a stick to the chart. "at night one of you will sneak into her tent and place it in her sleeping bag. I've read in the medical papers that she's allergic."

"Excellent." The leader said.

"So _not _excellent!" Elizabeth said putting down her book. "She could die. If she's really allergic? You guys are mad! You shouldn't even be planning murder attempts or trying to assult someone with a jump rope! You're all barking!" she got up and started walking.

"Where are you going Elizabeth?"

"I'm going to warn the poor girl that twenty three people are trying to KILL HER."

"GET HER!" The leader yelled as three girls tackled her and tied her up with some ferns.

"BLAKELY! Your next idea."

Blakely shuddered. She turned the page.

"Another, um, option is to tie her to a tree, and um, tie some steaks to her? There's rumors to having bears in the area. Even wolves. She'll get devoured."

"YOU JERK! YOU CAN'T POSSIBLY BE SERIOUS, CAN YOU? CAN ANY OF YOU?" Angie stuffed her sock into Elizabeth's mouth, who gagged, and had her mouth duct-taped.

The buzzer rang. The twenty two girls sighed.The girls hurried off to their next activity while the leader stayed. Elizabeth was choking on Angie's sock. The leader gracefully walked over and ripped off the duct tape and took the sock out of her mouth. Elizabeth spit as the leader took her by her shoulders and shook her, she threw her down as the ferns broke and Elizabeth went free.

"If you tell anybody," the leader said snatching her book.

"Don't, please, you know it was my-"

"Your mother's," She spat. She looked disgustingly at the book. "We all know. Your mother gave it to you on her death bed and told her even though you married in this book, you were in charge of your own destiny." She stuck a finger to her mouth. "Gag."

"Just give it back!" Elizabeth jumped up, but it was hard because her feet will still tied.

"Go get it," she said throwing the book into the water. It traveled down as Elizabeth jumped in after it. The other girl laughed as Elizabeth sputtered and cried as she grabbed the ruined book and hugged it, coughing and crying.

"Pathetic." The other girl laughed. She walked off her red hair swishing behind her leaving Elizabeth crying.


End file.
